to the parents who gave their son $5 for pulling out a permanent tooth

Thanks a lot. Seriously. My son came home from school today and told me, awestruck, how your son got $5 from the tooth fairy last night for losing a tooth twice.

"What?" I said. "You can't lose a tooth twice."

"Yes," he said. "He got $1 for the baby tooth and $5 for the next one."

"You only get two teeth," I said.

"I know," he said. "He pulled apart some LEGOs with the second tooth and it got loose and he wiggled it and ripped it out."

"He ripped it out? And his parents, I mean the tooth fairy, gave him $5 for that?"

"Yes, mom, because it's really RARE for a kid to lose his second tooth. It's a really special thing. I actually think some of my new teeth are loose."

See what you've done, parents? I had to tell my son that OUR tooth fairy does not bring money for second teeth and the only reason your son's tooth fairy did is because second teeth cost $1000 to replace and kids have to pay out of their own money. Not because it's rare. Because it's stupid and expensive. And the dentist has to give them a big shot in their mouth.

"And you WILL NOT get $5 for pulling out a second tooth."

I think he believed me. Here's hoping.