walking home from school

Hands down, this is the most spectacular autumn in memory. Most of the day I am far too busy to notice, which I why I savor the sweet moments walking Liam to and from school. This week has been especially brilliant - and bittersweet. Whether it's magical colored leaves or spunky five year olds, seasons change. I'm never ready, but always pleasantly surprised by what comes next. Right now we're just trying to relish the few romps in the leaves that we have left. Enjoy your day!

big steps

By 30 months, drawing independently without eating or throwing crayons isn't typically a topic for a blog post. But for this 30 month old, the accomplishment is a minor miracle. Liam was at the table drawing and Elliott climbed up on a chair, picked up a crayon, held it perfectly - which I have never seen him do before - and started very deliberately and slowly drawing circles, while stating proudly, "drawing kitties" (which, of course, sounded more like "awing idies"). He went through three pieces of paper, then finally declared, "all done," and got down from the chair.

It is difficult to express the emotion of those ten minutes. After hearing a neurologist just five months before say that she suspected Elliott had a genetic condition that is basically a form of mental retardation and quite possibly autism, these moments bring us to tears. Literally.

Over the past six weeks, Elliott's development has just soared. He makes us meals in his kitchen, plays trains for long periods of time, sits and looks at books, tells us what he sees and needs and feels, and, in pure Elliott fashion, says "hi" to absolutely everyone he sees. The boy is smart and focused and social. A second neurologist confirmed this for us last week when he concluded that other than lax ligaments that have led to Elliott's gross motor delays, there is nothing neurologically wrong with him. We are thanking God for leading us down alternative paths that we know have made a huge difference in Elliott, including chiropractic care, supplements and diet changes. He is waking up. Thank you, Lord.


The other boy also had some things to celebrate last week, particularly earning a yellow belt in Taekwondo, and bringing mom to tears again. The determination and joy evident in Liam's face as he went through the testing were priceless. And who can argue the five tenets of Taekwondo? Courtesy, sir! Integrity, sir! Perseverance, sir! Self control, sir! Indomitable spirit, sir!

At the end of the testing, he had to break a board with his fist. On one side of the board he had to write a habit he wanted to break and on the other side, a goal. After thinking about it a couple days, he wrote out the habit: "Stop being bossy to my friends." (He IS his mother's son.) And the goal: "Be nicer to my brother." It is funny and exciting to me that the one activity that's character building, discipline inducing, and run by tough yet tender role models is the one activity Liam never complains about. Beautiful.

8 years, celebrating normal

Recently I read a blog post extolling the virtues of a normal day. If this year of marriage has revealed anything new, it is this: A normal day, which to some outsider might look mundane or simple or even a little disorganized and crazed, is a treasure. Case in point, today, which marks eight years of marriage to my generous, involved, loyal, loving and stubborn Brit, went from rushing around to get the garbage out at 6:45 a.m. to breakfast out (a treat) to laundry and cleaning to Halloween decorating to guitar lessons to conference call to celebrating new words from Elliott to a play date with neighbors to free community dinner at church to choir for Liam to church council meeting to relaxing on the couch. We had the special anniversary dinner on Sunday, which made this day strikingly similar to every day. But I paid attention to it a little more. I relished it a little more. I gave thanks that this is where I am today. I wasn't yearning for some perfect tomorrow.

Last year I wrote a post about Andrew and ten of the reasons why I love him so. This year, in the wake of the death of another tremendous husband, difficult financial situations and uncertainties with Elliott, I am simply grateful for the normal days and for what holds us together - for faith and humor and passion and that intense desire to want our love and time and resources to extend to a larger circle. We all have periods of trial and joy; normal is where we live life out. Discovering that this place is both precious and enough, that's the secret.

[If you lament normal or often yearn for "some rare and perfect tomorrow," I highly recommend reading this poignant and beautiful post. I was really inspired by it, as you will see.]

dear elliott

I am so glad that you are here.
You always say hello. And hello. And I said hello.
You spot bird songs and airplanes and falling leaves.
You gasp.
You smile wild.
Nothing delights you like jumping,
even if your feet never leave the ground.
I am so glad that you are here.
A walk in the park with you
helps me remember how beautiful my world is.


thank you, martha

In a recent Wisecraft blog post, I read about this free photo conversion process on Martha Stewart's website. It is so easy and so cool. You just upload a photo and in seconds the site generates a pdf with this simplified image that looks like an Impressionist painting. Martha, of course, turns the process into a craft with glitter and such, but I just like the images as they are.

[If you are not sure how to get the image onto your desktop once the website converts it, here's what I did: At the bottom of the pdf, click the little icon that says "open in Preview." From Preview save the pdf to your desktop. Open the pdf in a program like Graphic Converter or Photoshop and crop out everything but the photo. Save as a jpg and voila!]

apple cardamom bliss

Today is cold, grey and rainy, and although I have too much work to be baking, I just couldn't resist making this apple cardamom coffeecake to eat with my afternoon tea. (I cut the recipe out of the newspaper years ago and don't even know who to thank or attribute it to.) If you love apples and pie-type spices and, well, cake, then you must make this recipe immediately. As with any delicious dessert-type dish that's made in a 9 x 13 pan, I recommend you plan to surprise a friend or neighbor with some slices. Not only will they think you are a fabulous baker, you will be saved from eating the whole pan by yourself, in one sitting.

Apple-Caradmom Coffeecake

2 1/4 cups all-purpose flour
1/4 teaspoon salt
1/2 teaspoon cinnamon
3/4 to 1 teaspoon cardamom
1 teaspoon ground ginger
1 1/2 cups brown sugar
3/4 cup oil
1 cup sliced almonds
1 teaspoon baking powder
1 teaspoon baking soda
1 egg
1 cup buttermilk
2 cups chopped apples (skin on is fine; the tarter the better)

Stir together flour, salt, cinnamon, cardamom, ginger, brown sugar and oil. Put 3/4 cup of the mixture in a separate bowl and mix with almonds to make the topping. Set aside. Mix baking power, baking soda, egg and buttermilk into the original flour-sugar mixture. Fold in apples and spread in greased 9 x 13 pan. Batter will look kind of like caramel. Cover with topping. Bake at 350 for 40 minutes.

Note: If you don't have cardamom among your spice jars, I highly recommend buying cardamom seeds at an Indian store (if you have one nearby). I grind the cardamom seed in my coffee grinder and the smell is awesome. Can't get fresher than that.

brave speller takes on Halloween

Last week lists littered the counter. Wedding tasks. Last minute purchases. Things to bring to the hotel. Preparations for a weekend departure. And, from Liam, the essential Halloween list. Although he politely went along with the wedding plans, there were occasional breakdowns throughout the week. As in, "We are NEVER going to decorate for Halloween!" and "Everyone has their decorations out but us!" So, not to be forgotten, Liam sat down and jotted down "after wedding" chores for himself and an identical list for Elliott.

In case you can't quite make out his "brave spelling," this is what each list includes: decorate, carve pumpkins, go trick or treating. Much simpler than mom's lists. And much more fun.

[A note about brave - or inventive - spelling: This approach to writing has been excellent for Liam who tends to be a bit of a perfectionist. Although he has written letters very well for quite some time, he has almost always wanted us to spell words for him so he doesn't get them wrong. Now he sounds out and "spells" everything himself, and rather than worry about whether a word is spelled "right," he enjoys the affirmation of knowing that he doing fantastic brave spelling and that he can get his thoughts down by himself.)

she's married!!

My sister Liz and her man Tim got hitched yesterday, and what a fun and happy celebration! Woo hoo!! With all four of us in the wedding and helping with various aspects of the day and surrounding activities, other things (like blogging) went by the wayside. We were just too busy making plans and making programs and making dinner and making placecards and making everyone presentable and making lingerie (ahem, yes, I sewed silky shorts - cute, but due to winging it and shoddy construction, they will probably fall apart, soon) and, most importantly, making memories.


As for the big day itself, I completely missed taking photos of anything other than a few blurry shots of the bride minutes before her debut (too much time spent ring-bearer wrangling). Liz looked stunning and jubilant. This photo does not begin to do her justice.


Elliott was like vapor. Impossible to pin down. But after only one spill on the slippery runner in too-big shoes, he made it down the aisle. Liam confidently led the four-child procession. As this photo shows, it's tough work carrying a little satin pillow down the aisle, sitting quietly in a pew and standing for 100 photos. But dancing with cousins makes up for it all. In fact, Liam informed me today that he has decided that he will be marrying Grace, my cousin's daughter. Or, as he identifies her: "Grace, a girl I met at the wedding." I thought maybe I should explain that marrying a cousin won't fly, but I decided to let it go. Tomorrow his future wife could well be "a girl I met at the library" or a friend from the neighborhood. We're just glad he's got at least 20 years to decide. Here's hoping he'll get as lucky as his uncle Tim.

what money doesn't buy

Adversity has the effect of eliciting talents, which in prosperous circumstances would have lain dormant. -Horace

I love to give gifts. And for years I would buy gifts even if I didn't have the money to do it. Now I just can't do that, but I hate to give up the gifting. Enter the sewing machine. Oh, how I love you, sewing machine. But, I wonder, if I had the money, if I didn't have to give my spending a second thought, would I know how much much I love to sew? Would I be as thrilled about the gifts I give as I imagine the recipients are to receive them? There are advantages to an empty pocketbook. I guess I never imagined that feeling richer would be one of them.